I’ve always thought of descending the steps towards death. I was a very active protester against life. Then I thought isn’t it Haram to commit a suicide in Islam? Does it worth it causing myself death? I’ve been through depression, insomnia and anxiety. I used to stare at the ceiling without thinking much; I used to cry without reasoning; I used to make myself sad even if I wasn’t; I used to stumble over my words and sleep a lot that I forgot my being alive. However, I thought to myself- have I traveled enough? Have I danced Tango? Have I read as much as I should? Have I fought with a Spanish taxi driver or mastered different languages or laughed from the bottom of my heart? No, I haven’t. Let alone religions, beliefs and concepts, I want to live for my own sake.